


Star-Spangled

by Nightsidesamurai



Category: Black Widow (Comics), Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: AU, F/M, Gen, PTSD, mcu - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-18
Updated: 2015-02-18
Packaged: 2018-03-13 13:17:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,902
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3382952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nightsidesamurai/pseuds/Nightsidesamurai
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stephen Rogers has been a prisoner of war for 10 years. Now that he is returning home from Afghanistan he has to deal with losing the life he knew before and building a new one while facing the horrors he can't quite forget.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Homecoming

Stephen stepped out of the plane and set foot on American soil for the first time in 10 years. He carried a dusty old duffel that had seen better days and his wrinkled ill-fitting clothing made him seem disheveled and strange. People avoided him while he made his way through the gate and into the terminal, his appearance making it clear that he wasn’t someone desirable.

If they knew where he had been and what he’d gone through they might have called him a hero or thanked him for his service but Stephen Rogers didn’t want to be reminded of the war he’d fought in. The nightmares and uncontrollable shakes were enough of a reminder of where he’d been and how much he had lost while he was away. He hadn’t worn his dress uniform or even camouflage gear, Stephen didn’t want to be seen at all, let alone as a hero soldier returning home.

His clothing provided a shield from the world around him, allowing him to glide under the radar of the people around him as he tried to acclimate himself to the world he’d thought completely lost. Exiting the airport he realized just how much he had missed when he saw almost everyone around him staring down at the screen of a cellular phone. He’d had his share of ugly flip phones before he’d enlisted but these tiny computers were something else. They would have definitely been useful when he’d needed to call for help or find his way out of the desert hills he’d lost himself in.

Already the shakes were threatening to take over and he clamped down hard on his racing thoughts. He tried the relaxation techniques the base doctor had recommended but they never seemed to work and Stephen knew he had to get away from the crowds and the noise. A taxi cab pulled up in front him, providing him a quick escape as he dived into the cool secluded interior. “Hey buddy, where to?” Away from the bustle of the gathered people he could feel the shaking subside a bit and he could gather his wits enough to respond. “569 Leaman Place, out in Lynn Brook please”, he stammered a little and the driver finally noted his shabby appearance. “Can you cover that long of a drive? I can’t have you dashing out after I go all that way”.

Stephen could understand his reluctance and he fished two crisp clean $20 bills out of his wallet and handed them over to the man. “I’ll give you the rest when we get there. Thank you”, he then sat back and waited for the ride to be over. Sitting in a vehicle had always been relaxing and this was no different. The driver tried to make pleasant conversation but Stephen just wasn’t interested in chatting and the man eventually gave up. He glanced back every so often, barely disguised pity in his eyes and a thin grin on his face. Eventually his focus shifted entirely to leaving the city and entering the quiet suburbs of Lynn Brook. 

Lynn Brook had once been a posh neighborhood of the wealthy and elite but eventually the rich moved on and families took over. Stephen had grown up in the carefully cultivated image of American perfection and his ideals had been formed in its neatly planned streets and healthy green lawns. His family was never rich and they often struggled but he had never felt the fear or pain that was often so common in the world. His father passed away when he was 13 and his mother worked hard to provide a happy home for him. She’d been so proud when he had enlisted and told her he’d decided to become a medic, to help people when so many would be striving to make war.

Despite his resolve to help and heal, Stephen had found a talent for being a soldier and his superiors encouraged this talent. He was moved from assignment to assignment, doing things that needed doing and that no one else could accomplish. They called him a super soldier and made him feel like a hero every time he put on his uniform. But it had all been a lie. That had become apparent to him when the whole system had abandoned him to the tender mercies of his captors.

“We’re here son. You sure this is the place? Looks empty”. Stephen couldn’t disagree, his old house was dark and closed off, and he wasn’t sure how livable it would be but it was the only place he had left. “Yeah, this is it. How much do I owe you?” He fished out his wallet and tried to hand him more cash but the driver waved him off. “I know that look you got in your eyes. Too faraway to see the world around you, too hurt to let anyone help. Where’d you serve?” Stephen was shocked that a stranger had seen him so unguarded that they could guess at where he’d been or what he’d done. He started shaking and fumbling with the door trying to get out of the car and escape the situation. “Woah son, I didn’t mean to spook you. Don’t worry I won’t pry any, just try and take care of yourself. Don’t be alone, take this”. The driver handed Stephen a card for the local VA office and unlocked the doors. Stephen practically fled out of the taxi, hardly noticing the Army tattoo on the driver's forearm before he fled into the shadows around the old house.

Stephen fumbled with his keys, the shaking in his hands making it hard to fit the old key into the lock and finally getting the door open and rushing inside. His mothers house was empty except for a few pieces of furniture covered by sheets and cardboard boxes with his name written across them. He supposed that his mother had packed up his things and made arrangements for her own property before she passed. Stephen had been discovering the horror of war when she had succumbed to illness while he was away. She had been there for him throughout his entire life but when she needed him he hadn’t been there and Stephen couldn’t forgive himself for abandoning her. In the darkened shell of the home he’d grown up in, all his dark memories from 10 years of hell welled up and threatened to consume him. It felt like ice crawling up his flesh and encasing him in a numb block of cold. The floor rose up to meet him as his shaking consumed all his energy and he couldn’t remain standing. Before the blackness clouded his vision completely he thought he heard a knock on his door but the ice had him and he gave up fighting the darkness.


	2. Fallen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Having fallen, Stephen finds a beautiful stranger helping him to his feet.

The first thing Stephen saw when he opened his eyes was an impossibility. A beautiful stranger with a halo of red hair around her face looked down at him and he was certain that he was dreaming. “Are you okay? I saw you fall from the window”. Her voice, clear and pleasant brought him back to reality and he instantly started blushing. He couldn’t believe a strange woman had come to rescue him from his demons and found him in such an embarrassing situation. “I’m fine, thank you miss. I just fainted a little. Thank you so much for checking but I’m okay”.

Stephen pushed himself to his feet and wobbled a little and the woman was there instantly to help him get steady again. “Careful now, don’t fall on me. How about you take it easy?” She guided him to a chair and lowered him into it, still holding tight to his arm. Stephen could smell lavender as her hair brushed his face and he lost himself in it for a moment, but only a moment. She was lovely and he was still a man and he was attracted but Stephen wasn’t really there most of the time. He was a shell wandering around waiting for the next attack of nerves to hit him. This woman probably only saw him as victim and honestly it was better that way.

“Thank you for helping me. I just got home after a long trip and I must be more tired than I thought. I’ll be fine really miss…?” She didn’t seem convinced with his story and she kept a firm hand on his shoulder in case he took another tumble. “My name is Natasha and I live next door. What’s your name neighbor?” Everything about her seemed remarkable to Stephen and her name completed the picture. It all fit together for him and he wished he was a whole man so that he could get to know her properly but the fear was too strong.

“My name is Stephen and this is my mom’s house. Well it was her house, she passed away while I was gone. I was thinking of moving in but maybe I should have come earlier in the day to really see it”. He’d begun rambling but couldn’t seem to stop, this woman knocked down all his defenses and he didn’t know what to do. “I haven’t been back home for so long, I don’t even recognize it. All I know is that mom is gone and I can’t stop shaking. I don’t know why I’m telling you all this. I’m just a strange broken guy and you are too nice. I should go to bed and stop bothering you. I’m sure you have better things to do Miss Natasha”.

“First of all you call me Natasha, we’re neighbors and we’re going to be friends. Neighbors look out for each other and I’m sure you would do the same if I needed help”. She hauled Stephen to his feet and guided him slowly to the bedroom where an old mattress lay bare on the frame. Stephen was barely coherent now and he shook fearfully in her arms. “I think you’re right though, you need your rest and there will be plenty of time to get to know each other. Just rest and you’ll be okay”.

Natasha lowered him into the bed and tucked one of the white sheets laying around Stephen’s wide shoulders. She continued whispering reassurances to the frightened man until he finally drifted off into a restless sleep. She sat beside the bed wondering who exactly he was and why he’d appeared suddenly in the quiet neighborhood she’d made her home. She didn’t have friends here, she lived a solitary life and enjoyed it but this shivering man had caught her attention and now she simply couldn’t abandon him. Natasha had never had much of a nurturing side, she had lived through too many hardships to be naturally caring but something about this tall whimpering man tugged at her heart.

She stayed with him until she saw the horizon begin to lighten and the thought of explaining why she was still there seemed to awkward. Natasha took one last look at him and slipped quietly out of the house. She should have been tired but instead she was only pensive as the dawn rolled in and brought the day to life. Her new neighbor intrigued her and she couldn’t get him off her mind for some reason. He was weak and fearful but she saw something at his core that spoke of strength, even through all the shakes. 

Natasha brewed a cup of tea and curled up on her couch to watch the sun rise from her window. She fell asleep with thoughts of strange blond men bouncing around in her head.


	3. Opportunity Knocks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natasha finds her routine interrupted by a shaky Stephen. Where will the two strangers find themselves as they get to know each other?

Natasha woke with a start as her dreams of shivering blond men turned to her usual fearful remembrances. It would be better for her to be awake and tired than dealing with the ghosts of her past, that was for certain. She glanced at the clock on her wall and noticed that it was almost time for lunch and her stomach was rumbling. After a cat-like stretch on the couch, she pushed herself up and headed for the kitchen.

Her thoughts couldn’t help but stray to her new neighbor and she wondered what his story was. A man of that size could have easily pushed her away or forced her out of his home but he was weak as a kitten and pliable to her commands. Natasha prepared her food and brought the plate to the small office where she did her work. It was the only place in the house that was personalized, with pictures of her sisters adorning the walls and landscape paintings of a cold and snowy countryside. The decorating style was simple and might have been plain compared to others in the neighborhood but it revealed a lot about the woman.

If anyone had asked the other residents about the red-headed woman they would have had difficulty commenting on anything besides her striking appearance and Natasha liked it that way. She was private in a very strict way. Her home, her plans, and her thoughts were entirely her own and she responded aggressively when this privacy was threatened. Her neighbor across the street had learned this the hard way when he’d tried to push her into accepting an invitation for dinner. He had left with a broken nose and a promise for worse if he ever came back.

Pushing people away had become her most useful defense mechanism and she was surprised that she wasn’t already making an effort to make Stephen go away. Natasha rationalized it away by remembering how weak he was and she wasn’t worried that he would hurt her. He seemed too afraid of his own shadow to worry her and he’d probably make an effort to avoid her. He seemed like a man who, like herself, wanted to hide from the world. Why else would he be dressed like a homeless person for no reason?

Natasha made an effort to push thoughts of the man out of her mind and focus on her work. She had several clients waiting on her to review the accounts and make recommendations. She loved that she could work from home, hidden from the view of her clients and the fact that she did an important service for people who had financial secrets brought her a sense of purpose. These were people who had a need to hide things just like she did and using her previous experiences to take care of herself independently. Relying on other people had been how she’d encounter so many problems in her past and she would rather be dead than beholden to another person.

She buried herself in her work for several hours, easily losing herself in the numbers and twisting paths of the computer world to meet her clients’ need. The sun was beginning to set before she was finally caught up and could set the work aside. She was thinking about dinner when a knock on her door startled her. People never knocked on her door, it just wasn’t done after the first few times she’d responded with glaring silence to visitors. Maybe it was just a mistake and they would leave her to her quiet evening.

Stephen listened at the silence at his neighbors door and pondered if he had made a mistake in visiting the beautiful woman who had come to his rescue. He was raised to repay kindness and he wasn’t going to ignore his closest neighbor after she assisted him. So even though he was already shaking and he felt like he was going to throw up, he raised his hand and knocked again. He knew she was home (he’d seen her through an window) and he would at least apologize before he went home.

He ended up waiting several minutes before he heard quick footsteps coming to the door before it whipped open and the lovely woman glared, ready to unleash a flurry of angry words. Stephen flinched in anticipation of her annoyance lashing out at him. Instead her expression softened and she immediately opened the door wider. “Hello Stephen! What a lovely surprise to see you. Are you feeling better?” Her voice put him slightly more at ease and drew closer to her without really noticing it.

“Um, I’m feeling better. I just came by to thank you for checking on me. If you need any help with anything, uh please let me know”. His mission complete he began edging away from her door, ready to hide in the house and planning to never speak to her again. “I have to go though so, I’ll see you around. Goodbye”. He stumbled over himself and almost ran away before Natasha could respond to his awkward thank you.

Natasha mumbled a bewildered “You’re welcome” at empty air, wondering what exactly to make of the strange man. She would have invited him in for tea or something but he was out of sight before she could even get the words out. This behavior didn’t worry her though, she simply resolved to spend time with her shy neighbor and bring him out of his shell. She’d spent so much time alone that she hadn’t realized how much she missed having company.

Tonight was too late to try and get him to visit but soon she’d see just what made Stephen tick.


End file.
